








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2639 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,881 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2835 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2571 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2146 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2329 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $487,682 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Black Elvis | 914 | 0.21 | 23 min |
| #2 | Zoddom | 426 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #3 | Weda | 349 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #4 | Agent Simmons | 319 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | beng0r | 241 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Black Elvis | +4.19 | 80 | 66 |
| #2 | klonk | +3.47 | 85 | 68 |
| #3 | guru | +1.95 | 71 | 74 |
| #4 | Zoddom | +0.99 | 75 | 68 |
| #5 | beng0r | +0.76 | 47 | 62 |





