








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
925 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 852 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1537 | 43% |
| HE Grenades | 1042 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 178 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $318,176 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dauthlin | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | wasdern | 58% | 26 |
| #3 | itsFrasse | 53% | 127 |
| #4 | Vassviik | 52% | 91 |
| #5 | Lucens | 47% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | wasdern | 58% | 26 |
| #3 | itsFrasse | 53% | 127 |
| #4 | Vassviik | 52% | 91 |
| #5 | Lucens | 47% | 38 |
| #6 | Piraten | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vassviik | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | itsFrasse | 5 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vassviik | 354 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | itsFrasse | 227 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | Lucens | 80 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | wasdern | 49 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Piraten | 14 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | itsFrasse | +2.72 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | wasdern | +0.86 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | Dauthlin | +0.55 | 73 | 50 |
| #4 | Vassviik | +0.11 | 81 | 67 |
| #5 | Hulta184 | -2.08 | 54 | 60 |





