








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 84 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1163 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,302 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1424 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1220 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1200 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1458 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $351,619 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snw | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | BeanNess | 73% | 15 |
| #3 | J4kenator | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | AIZEN | 61% | 18 |
| #5 | MooN | 57% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | CnKRevenge | 48% | 44 |
| #9 | romeo | 47% | 17 |
| #10 | KYY | 47% | 62 |
| #11 | T-Goose | 30% | 10 |
| #12 | Smitty | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | romeo | 5 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Smitty | 4 | 0.0169 |
| #3 | MooN | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | BeanNess | 3 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | KYY | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KYY | 286 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #2 | CnKRevenge | 134 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | MooN | 85 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | AIZEN | 80 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | romeo | 56 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J4kenator | +6.00 | 92 | 48 |
| #2 | romeo | +3.82 | 75 | 72 |
| #3 | AIZEN | +2.71 | 79 | 70 |
| #4 | BeanNess | +2.06 | 63 | 60 |
| #5 | KYY | +1.43 | 59 | 74 |





