








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 617 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 286 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3006 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,335 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3914 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2648 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2388 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2385 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,368,910 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProPlayerArbi | 51% | 59 |
| #2 | Xion | 50% | 212 |
| #3 | AsianBotman | 48% | 153 |
| #4 | Jon | 46% | 223 |
| #5 | Hentai Kamen | 45% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Xion | 50% | 212 |
| #3 | AsianBotman | 48% | 153 |
| #4 | Jon | 46% | 223 |
| #5 | Hentai Kamen | 45% | 137 |
| #6 | Vangetti | 41% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xion | 12 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | AsianBotman | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Vangetti | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Jon | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Hentai Kamen | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jon | 895 | 0.19 | 27 min |
| #2 | Hentai Kamen | 342 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | Vangetti | 309 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | Xion | 280 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | AsianBotman | 234 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vangetti | +2.25 | 72 | 59 |
| #2 | ProPlayerArbi | +2.14 | 75 | 72 |
| #3 | Xion | +1.16 | 64 | 53 |
| #4 | tzuyu | +0.02 | 71 | 61 |
| #5 | Jon | -0.40 | 50 | 64 |





