








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1050 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 378 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3187 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,862 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1446 | 13% |
| Smokes | 3308 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3557 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2551 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,121,913 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AsianBotman | 51% | 172 |
| #2 | tzuyu | 50% | 212 |
| #3 | ProPlayerArbi | 49% | 55 |
| #4 | Jon | 49% | 247 |
| #5 | Vangetti | 48% | 153 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | tzuyu | 50% | 212 |
| #3 | ProPlayerArbi | 49% | 55 |
| #4 | Jon | 49% | 247 |
| #5 | Vangetti | 48% | 153 |
| #6 | Hentai Kamen | 46% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AsianBotman | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Vangetti | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Jon | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | ProPlayerArbi | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | tzuyu | 3 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jon | 1018 | 0.19 | 30 min |
| #2 | tzuyu | 656 | 0.14 | 18 min |
| #3 | Hentai Kamen | 414 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | Vangetti | 379 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #5 | AsianBotman | 282 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vangetti | +2.18 | 73 | 59 |
| #2 | ProPlayerArbi | +1.96 | 76 | 69 |
| #3 | Xion | +0.76 | 63 | 52 |
| #4 | tzuyu | -0.54 | 67 | 60 |
| #5 | Jon | -0.70 | 48 | 64 |





