








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 491 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2918 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,533 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4436 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4669 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3333 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2095 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,489,140 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 817 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KFC Zinger Box | 61% | 36 |
| #2 | nase | 58% | 55 |
| #3 | FoksMachine | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | Bear of bad news | 56% | 39 |
| #5 | small sludge | 56% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | AtomicCaleb | 42% | 36 |
| #14 | Large Stone Statue | 41% | 147 |
| #15 | The Toaster | 37% | 35 |
| #16 | Double Chunk Choc Enjoyer | 35% | 52 |
| #17 | harpseal2 | 33% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rexy | 19 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Ford Gaming | 14 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | Large Stone Statue | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | AD2 | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Double Chunk Choc Enjoyer | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ford Gaming | 947 | 0.23 | 19 min |
| #2 | Rexy | 376 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #3 | AD2 | 309 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Large Stone Statue | 298 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | Bear of bad news | 243 | 0.33 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nase | +4.23 | 83 | 64 |
| #2 | Bear of bad news | +2.83 | 75 | 78 |
| #3 | small sludge | +2.69 | 73 | 67 |
| #4 | Rexy | +2.54 | 68 | 48 |
| #5 | FoksMachine | +2.23 | 66 | 58 |





