








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 635 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 162 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5634 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,913 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5331 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4775 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6066 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 6741 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,950,931 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 181 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slabo | 2575 | 0.26 | 77 min |
| #2 | echo | 1117 | 0.35 | 25 min |
| #3 | naweedy | 1090 | 0.17 | 26 min |
| #4 | davey_d | 876 | 0.16 | 21 min |
| #5 | fupas | 627 | 0.12 | 17 min |





