








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 133 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Esplay | 9 matches | 2,341 | |
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
415 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 926 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 222 | 24% |
| Smokes | 271 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 190 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 243 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $154,596 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grumpyMonk | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | FrekaFiskeNN^^ | 83% | 12 |
| #3 | Fuzz | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Bukhavez | 63% | 19 |
| #5 | coachdp | 63% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ugh | 60% | 5 |
| #7 | KralleJ | 60% | 20 |
| #8 | Botman | 59% | 22 |
| #9 | iAvocado | 57% | 21 |
| #10 | drakx durden | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KralleJ | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Bukhavez | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iAvocado | 90 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | KralleJ | 68 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | Botman | 63 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | coachdp | 34 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #5 | Bukhavez | 31 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grumpyMonk | +5.76 | 79 | 71 |
| #2 | lau's | +3.85 | 97 | 53 |
| #3 | Botman | +2.31 | 92 | 70 |
| #4 | Bukhavez | +1.87 | 88 | 65 |
| #5 | FrekaFiskeNN^^ | +1.84 | 85 | 74 |





