








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 397 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2031 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,842 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2498 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2500 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3273 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2571 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,104,657 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 342 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☭ SteeLe. | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | DontDoDrugsKids | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | ENTE AUF STOFF | 49% | 76 |
| #4 | 96in3 | Narkolepsie | 48% | 232 |
| #5 | onlinerage | 47% | 162 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ENTE AUF STOFF | +3.58 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | micha` | +2.32 | 77 | 71 |
| #3 | DontDoDrugsKids | +2.08 | 74 | 64 |
| #4 | ☭ SteeLe. | +1.47 | 63 | 56 |
| #5 | onlinerage | +0.86 | 60 | 66 |





