








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 714 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 469 matches | ||
| Premier | 153 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7357 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,491 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3101 | 11% |
| Smokes | 8770 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 8549 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 8071 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,341,154 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g@ndоnchik | 56% | 128 |
| #2 | F1MKS | 54% | 91 |
| #3 | crap bag | 53% | 401 |
| #4 | L1mber | 53% | 137 |
| #5 | no1ess | 53% | 458 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | no1ess | 53% | 458 |
| #6 | qqname | 53% | 397 |
| #7 | G00dYear | 52% | 584 |
| #8 | Fox MarinesCorp. | 52% | 186 |
| #9 | Sooler | 47% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crap bag | 7 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | G00dYear | 5 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | no1ess | 5 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Fox MarinesCorp. | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | qqname | 4 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crap bag | 1175 | 0.14 | 34 min |
| #2 | G00dYear | 1162 | 0.09 | 28 min |
| #3 | no1ess | 1071 | 0.11 | 22 min |
| #4 | Fox MarinesCorp. | 543 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #5 | L1mber | 339 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | >:) | +2.13 | 72 | 63 |
| #2 | G00dYear | +0.44 | 70 | 68 |
| #3 | g@ndоnchik | -0.05 | 48 | 75 |
| #4 | L1mber | -0.32 | 39 | 74 |
| #5 | qqname | -0.57 | 59 | 42 |





