








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 631 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 441 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3244 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,436 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5940 | 25% |
| Smokes | 5961 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6414 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5121 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $643,315 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 248 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vorre | 59% | 144 |
| #2 | Leifee | 50% | 330 |
| #3 | AJJroKK | 49% | 315 |
| #4 | huttjr | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | cäl | 48% | 277 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | huttjr | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | cäl | 48% | 277 |
| #6 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 48% | 281 |
| #7 | Majstro | 43% | 97 |
| #8 | Störmen | 43% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AJJroKK | 8 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | cäl | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | vorre | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Leifee | 2 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AJJroKK | 509 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #2 | Leifee | 282 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | vorre | 241 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 174 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #5 | cäl | 82 | 0.01 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | huttjr | +2.67 | 72 | 54 |
| #2 | Leifee | +0.98 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | AJJroKK | +0.58 | 71 | 62 |
| #4 | vorre | +0.40 | 52 | 70 |
| #5 | ☁️ i'm cake. | -0.09 | 61 | 52 |





