








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 345 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1099 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,765 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 378 | 8% |
| Smokes | 1422 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1637 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1328 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $762,560 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vorre | 50% | 20 |
| #2 | AJJroKK | 44% | 79 |
| #3 | Mr.Abdinojojoj | 43% | 97 |
| #4 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 42% | 108 |
| #5 | Leifee | 41% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 42% | 108 |
| #5 | Leifee | 41% | 116 |
| #6 | cäl | 39% | 69 |
| #7 | huttjr | 38% | 13 |
| #8 | Störmen | 28% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Abdinojojoj | 8 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | cäl | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | AJJroKK | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | huttjr | 2 | 0.0072 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Abdinojojoj | 331 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #2 | AJJroKK | 143 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Leifee | 128 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 63 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Störmen | 50 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vorre | +1.26 | 64 | 66 |
| #2 | huttjr | +1.21 | 75 | 59 |
| #3 | Leifee | +0.81 | 72 | 58 |
| #4 | AJJroKK | +0.22 | 69 | 60 |
| #5 | ☁️ i'm cake. | +0.03 | 62 | 55 |





