








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 688 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 365 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 165 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4519 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,612 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1719 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3049 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2820 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3024 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,823,366 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 98 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vorre | 57% | 152 |
| #2 | Mr.Abdinojojoj | 50% | 330 |
| #3 | AJJroKK | 50% | 298 |
| #4 | cäl | 49% | 266 |
| #5 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 47% | 288 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | cäl | 49% | 266 |
| #5 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 47% | 288 |
| #6 | Störmen | 43% | 42 |
| #7 | huttjr | 41% | 34 |
| #8 | Majstro | 41% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Abdinojojoj | 14 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | cäl | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | AJJroKK | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | vorre | 5 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Abdinojojoj | 1071 | 0.15 | 21 min |
| #2 | AJJroKK | 464 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #3 | vorre | 245 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | ☁️ i'm cake. | 173 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #5 | cäl | 77 | 0.01 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | huttjr | +1.74 | 72 | 53 |
| #2 | Leifee | +0.90 | 72 | 59 |
| #3 | vorre | +0.46 | 53 | 69 |
| #4 | AJJroKK | +0.44 | 71 | 62 |
| #5 | ☁️ i'm cake. | -0.03 | 63 | 51 |





