








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
727 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,645 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1829 | 39% |
| Smokes | 1080 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1020 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 716 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $475,748 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 120 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | holly | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | kixetic | 77% | 13 |
| #3 | dogalyyst | 67% | 27 |
| #4 | Fawx ♥ | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | shitting my pants for jesus | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | holly | +8.70 | 92 | 13 |
| #2 | Fawx ♥ | +6.88 | 90 | 53 |
| #3 | kixetic | +3.45 | 43 | 51 |
| #4 | noodlepuppy 🍜 | +3.14 | 37 | 63 |
| #5 | dogalyyst | +3.03 | 58 | 51 |





