








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1508 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 702 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 152 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6823 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,564 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5783 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4977 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 10920 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 8884 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,423,137 of utility $216 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HoeKim420 | 66% | 88 |
| #2 | jesgul | 54% | 96 |
| #3 | Axticy ζ | 54% | 185 |
| #4 | cazpi | 54% | 39 |
| #5 | Krasnik | 53% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | str0ofe | 11 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | sLETTEMOENsjIO- | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | jesgul | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Axticy ζ | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | HoeKim420 | 4 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jesgul | +3.09 | 79 | 62 |
| #2 | Sushimonster | +2.50 | 72 | 53 |
| #3 | ulven | +2.04 | 81 | 69 |
| #4 | HoeKim420 | +1.98 | 45 | 76 |
| #5 | Axticy ζ | +1.02 | 70 | 44 |





