








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 86 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1251 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,150 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 841 | 27% |
| Smokes | 771 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 814 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 724 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $545,379 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ngeezy | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | smaul | 66% | 56 |
| #3 | ZonieLoL | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | Villain | 57% | 44 |
| #5 | ruishi | 57% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Villain | 5 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | ZonieLoL | 4 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | ruishi | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | d2rat69 | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | smaul | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d2rat69 | 448 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #2 | ruishi | 281 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #3 | smaul | 165 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | Villain | 93 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | OSTL | 84 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruishi | +2.51 | 77 | 71 |
| #2 | smaul | +2.37 | 68 | 70 |
| #3 | Villain | +1.43 | 79 | 62 |
| #4 | d2rat69 | +1.38 | 83 | 71 |
| #5 | OSTL | +0.92 | 72 | 76 |





