








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1897 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 315 | 10% |
| Smokes | 1028 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1181 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 751 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $796,925 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LilKrokodil | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | BoB | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | Vayne | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Qopy | 56% | 70 |
| 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ^؟≪?ness؟≪? | 48% | 110 |
| #10 | DumTs ♠ | 45% | 22 |
| #11 | frewd | 44% | 34 |
| #12 | Op1e | 43% | 81 |
| #13 | Cicolas Nage #Skinsmonkey | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^؟≪?ness؟≪? | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Newbie1Kenobi | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | W Gamer | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Op1e | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Qopy | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^؟≪?ness؟≪? | 340 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #2 | Op1e | 289 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | Qopy | 182 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | Newmountain^ | 73 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | frewd | 69 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LilKrokodil | +4.25 | 89 | 61 |
| +2.18 | 59 | 61 | ||
| #3 | ^؟≪?ness؟≪? | +1.74 | 69 | 71 |
| #4 | frewd | +1.74 | 69 | 65 |
| #5 | Vayne | +1.20 | 70 | 68 |





