








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 158 matches | ||
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3942 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,864 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5032 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5085 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3633 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3114 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,471,206 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 469 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ålen 4gÛrkz3n | 60% | 109 |
| #2 | Ligegl'Atli | 55% | 253 |
| #3 | Pallekat | 54% | 324 |
| #4 | H1ssiDoz | 54% | 281 |
| #5 | SuperSalt | 54% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Ligegl'Atli | 55% | 253 |
| #3 | Pallekat | 54% | 324 |
| #4 | H1ssiDoz | 54% | 281 |
| #5 | SuperSalt | 54% | 134 |
| #6 | J-dog | 46% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H1ssiDoz | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Ligegl'Atli | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Pallekat | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Ålen 4gÛrkz3n | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | SuperSalt | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ligegl'Atli | 1274 | 0.23 | 41 min |
| #2 | Pallekat | 428 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #3 | H1ssiDoz | 354 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #4 | Ålen 4gÛrkz3n | 238 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | SuperSalt | 232 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ålen 4gÛrkz3n | +3.32 | 64 | 71 |
| #2 | Ligegl'Atli | +1.93 | 46 | 88 |
| #3 | Mutang | +1.56 | 73 | 81 |
| #4 | SuperSalt | +1.56 | 36 | 73 |
| #5 | J-dog | +0.87 | 46 | 65 |





