








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 180 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 99 matches | ||
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2346 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,406 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2109 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1823 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2498 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1976 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $483,411 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 346 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mutang | 60% | 109 |
| #2 | H1ssiDoz | 55% | 168 |
| #3 | Pallekat | 54% | 191 |
| #4 | Ligegl'Atli | 54% | 157 |
| #5 | SuperSalt | 51% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | H1ssiDoz | 55% | 168 |
| #3 | Pallekat | 54% | 191 |
| #4 | Ligegl'Atli | 54% | 157 |
| #5 | SuperSalt | 51% | 127 |
| #6 | ✪ Kung Fugh | 33% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pallekat | 8 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Ligegl'Atli | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | H1ssiDoz | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | SuperSalt | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Mutang | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ligegl'Atli | 827 | 0.25 | 28 min |
| #2 | Mutang | 354 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | Pallekat | 228 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | SuperSalt | 201 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | H1ssiDoz | 168 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ålen 4gÛrkz3n | +2.91 | 65 | 72 |
| #2 | Mutang | +1.27 | 74 | 84 |
| #3 | Ligegl'Atli | +1.21 | 47 | 88 |
| #4 | SuperSalt | +0.93 | 37 | 71 |
| #5 | H1ssiDoz | -1.42 | 50 | 57 |





