








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 334 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 551 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5147 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,736 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6054 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7367 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 5240 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4075 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,970,104 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 504 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chrisper | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | glock johnson | 57% | 94 |
| #3 | tangle | 55% | 150 |
| #4 | Limey Bones Jones | 53% | 261 |
| #5 | Kane McCrum | 53% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lach | 21 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | brown | 13 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Kane McCrum | 11 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Limey Bones Jones | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Nugget | 9 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lach | 456 | 0.06 | 15 min |
| #2 | tangle | 432 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #3 | brown | 424 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #4 | Limey Bones Jones | 399 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #5 | waterhouse gamer | 327 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glock johnson | +8.10 | 76 | 48 |
| #2 | kush krazy | +3.48 | 69 | 46 |
| #3 | tangle | +2.40 | 58 | 64 |
| #4 | lach | +1.51 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | Nugget | +0.96 | 68 | 52 |





