








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1528 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,221 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1786 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2531 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1319 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1585 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $531,345 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kave_in | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | Eatingpets | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | Saviner | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | TheGreySeawolf | 55% | 29 |
| #5 | Clxtch | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | GF | NeKo | 39% | 33 |
| #15 | GoogleMKULTRA | 38% | 16 |
| #16 | Z u l F | 33% | 15 |
| #17 | * Fresh | 33% | 24 |
| #18 | ry^_^ | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blood Eagle | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | TheGreySeawolf | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | Vice | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | GF | NeKo | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | * Fresh | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blood Eagle | 104 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | Vic | 95 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | Reyicel | 94 | 0.31 | 3 min |
| #4 | GF | NeKo | 90 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | GrandPa(nda) | 73 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kave_in | +3.89 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | Reyicel | +2.48 | 70 | 64 |
| #3 | DirtyPigeon | +2.04 | 76 | 51 |
| #4 | Eatingpets | +1.24 | 58 | 61 |
| #5 | Clxtch | +1.07 | 86 | 46 |





