








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 827 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 354 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




139 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4999 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,722 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3130 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1900 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2734 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1958 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,437,923 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 147 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bigwhiffa | 50% | 28 |
| #2 | Tremolite | 50% | 34 |
| #3 | time to clock in | 48% | 231 |
| #4 | KEITH STALIN | 47% | 43 |
| #5 | LittleMonkey | 45% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | yani | 45% | 132 |
| #7 | Mayor of Value Town | 43% | 196 |
| #8 | Kodak Brick | 42% | 157 |
| #9 | LeBron | 42% | 118 |
| #10 | Wiseboy | 37% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yani | 70 | 0.0257 |
| #2 | Kodak Brick | 56 | 0.0171 |
| #3 | time to clock in | 53 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | Mayor of Value Town | 41 | 0.0099 |
| #5 | bigwhiffa | 21 | 0.0335 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yani | 966 | 0.35 | 27 min |
| #2 | Mayor of Value Town | 808 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #3 | time to clock in | 735 | 0.15 | 20 min |
| #4 | LeBron | 715 | 0.29 | 19 min |
| #5 | Kodak Brick | 404 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tremolite | +3.54 | 78 | 50 |
| #2 | Reverse Stinkuur | +2.70 | 78 | 53 |
| #3 | yani | +0.76 | 63 | 68 |
| #4 | bigwhiffa | +0.03 | 66 | 7 |
| #5 | KEITH STALIN | -0.47 | 61 | 33 |





