








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 681 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 209 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




87 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4290 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3844 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5160 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3271 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1776 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $982,391 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 402 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j0s | 59% | 32 |
| #2 | G-SMOKE | 57% | 148 |
| #3 | ИF | 57% | 203 |
| #4 | Luna | 56% | 82 |
| #5 | Ghop ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ | 56% | 157 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EddieG | 52 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | knth | 34 | 0.0152 |
| #3 | G-SMOKE | 27 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | ИF | 17 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Ghop ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)Ɑ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝﮞ | 16 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j0s | +4.34 | 91 | 62 |
| #2 | G-SMOKE | +3.79 | 71 | 62 |
| #3 | ИF | +2.02 | 78 | 54 |
| #4 | EddieG | +1.88 | 61 | 56 |
| #5 | Lübbi™ | +1.02 | 86 | 37 |





