








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 113 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1039 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,818 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 561 | 20% |
| Smokes | 902 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 854 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 501 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $328,627 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dudlileif | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | pasha | 50% | 6 |
| #3 | resa | 45% | 97 |
| #4 | skruffynor | 42% | 45 |
| #5 | Moz | 42% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | skruffynor | 42% | 45 |
| #5 | Moz | 42% | 55 |
| #6 | 1peek | 40% | 48 |
| #7 | Mysil Bergsprekken | 38% | 8 |
| #8 | Maniac | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | resa | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Moz | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | 1peek | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | skruffynor | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Mysil Bergsprekken | 1 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | resa | 232 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | 1peek | 62 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | skruffynor | 46 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Maniac | 11 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | Moz | 9 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Morning | +3.27 | 55 | 53 |
| #2 | Mysil Bergsprekken | +2.92 | 79 | 50 |
| #3 | pasha | +1.43 | 81 | 51 |
| #4 | resa | +0.48 | 34 | 63 |
| #5 | skruffynor | +0.25 | 21 | 51 |





