








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 385 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 158 matches | ||
| Faceit | 71 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3277 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,825 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1282 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2357 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2228 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1958 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $926,336 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ANX | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | Aqua1s | 65% | 20 |
| #3 | Ryanmck6 | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | Khaos | 64% | 42 |
| #5 | Lebron James | 58% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Gliss | 52% | 66 |
| #11 | Kenneth | 51% | 55 |
| #12 | somepepsi | 50% | 16 |
| #13 | SL1M | 50% | 18 |
| #14 | Huycks | 44% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gliss | 8 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Jim Rob | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Cereal Killa | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Kenneth | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Taffy | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kenneth | 357 | 0.30 | 10 min |
| #2 | Jim Rob | 326 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #3 | Lebron James | 228 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #4 | Gliss | 224 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Taffy | 183 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jim Rob | +2.06 | 73 | 59 |
| #2 | Huycks | +1.70 | 72 | 61 |
| #3 | ARC | +1.30 | 73 | 67 |
| #4 | Cereal Killa | +1.17 | 83 | 56 |
| #5 | somepepsi | +1.09 | 76 | 71 |





