










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1354 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 483 matches | ||
| Faceit | 150 matches | ||
| Renown | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 41,305 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11288 | 27% |
| Smokes | 11848 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 8718 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 9451 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,470,914 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2792 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | steff0 | 59% | 130 |
| #2 | cjayyatess | 57% | 397 |
| #3 | Magno ♥ | 56% | 107 |
| #4 | jjakc | 53% | 561 |
| #5 | boom | 52% | 440 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Emilio Banderas | 48% | 145 |
| #9 | much profile very name | 47% | 164 |
| #10 | HookEm | 45% | 177 |
| #11 | ilookmorecubanthanmaverick | 44% | 103 |
| #12 | Knecker. | 42% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jjakc | 22 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | boom | 15 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | cjayyatess | 15 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | HookEm | 10 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Rownoid | 7 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cjayyatess | 2550 | 0.31 | 61 min |
| #2 | boom | 2325 | 0.26 | 60 min |
| #3 | jjakc | 1659 | 0.14 | 39 min |
| #4 | HookEm | 707 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #5 | much profile very name | 676 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cjayyatess | +2.00 | 81 | 68 |
| #2 | boom | +1.88 | 83 | 72 |
| #3 | heli- | +1.42 | 81 | 65 |
| #4 | steff0 | +0.43 | 87 | 57 |
| #5 | much profile very name | +0.12 | 59 | 65 |





