








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 678 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2129 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,358 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4039 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2292 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2327 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2700 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $865,813 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 301 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nuжipon | 48% | 123 |
| #2 | DerMarvin | 46% | 67 |
| #3 | Hiroschijoshi | 45% | 182 |
| #4 | Dante0 [Kaiju] | 44% | 229 |
| #5 | Rock | 42% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dante0 [Kaiju] | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | V3noM | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | VP|logiX Deathmen | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Hiroschijoshi | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Rock | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dante0 [Kaiju] | 598 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #2 | V3noM | 340 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #3 | DerMarvin | 297 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #4 | Hiroschijoshi | 259 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #5 | VP|logiX Deathmen | 110 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DerMarvin | +3.53 | 63 | 62 |
| #2 | Rock | +2.48 | 52 | 65 |
| #3 | Hiroschijoshi | +0.91 | 47 | 59 |
| #4 | nuжipon | -0.02 | 61 | 35 |
| #5 | Dante0 [Kaiju] | -0.10 | 59 | 66 |





