








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 782 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 582 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 130 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,249 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5019 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6226 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5907 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4097 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,101,537 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 215 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RepercussioN | 64% | 83 |
| #2 | Vasooli Bhai | 56% | 52 |
| #3 | Ashura Haouken | 55% | 121 |
| #4 | » mokkorloff_™ /A/ | 52% | 64 |
| #5 | sky | 51% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | MaXpAiN™ LaG iS Lyf!!! | 48% | 94 |
| #9 | z0E. | 47% | 86 |
| #10 | A L O Y S I U S | 46% | 68 |
| #11 | WOOKA novaMeister 24756 kills | 41% | 73 |
| #12 | Fraction | 40% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOOKA novaMeister 24756 kills | 17 | 0.0111 |
| #2 | Lime | 12 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Vasooli Bhai | 9 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | z0E. | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | sky | 6 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime | 1066 | 0.15 | 29 min |
| #2 | Ashura Haouken | 362 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | » mokkorloff_™ /A/ | 256 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | A L O Y S I U S | 188 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | sky | 178 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RepercussioN | +2.64 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | Vasooli Bhai | +1.78 | 63 | 56 |
| #3 | » mokkorloff_™ /A/ | +1.75 | 69 | 69 |
| #4 | sky | +1.16 | 58 | 63 |
| #5 | Fraction | +0.83 | 52 | 65 |





