








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 468 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 311 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3339 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,878 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3632 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3754 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2384 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3108 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,745,995 of utility $227 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 438 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pzy7 | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | MaddoxX | 67% | 57 |
| #3 | RepercussioN | 66% | 93 |
| #4 | Vasooli Bhai | 61% | 23 |
| #5 | sky | 60% | 151 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | WOOKA novaMeister 24756 kills | 50% | 32 |
| #13 | Fraction | 50% | 38 |
| #14 | ⭕⃤ P R I? | 48% | 21 |
| #15 | MaXpAiN™ LaG iS Lyf!!! | 48% | 42 |
| #16 | ✪ ATG | 26% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | » mokkorloff_™ /A/ | 7 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | WOOKA novaMeister 24756 kills | 7 | 0.0104 |
| #4 | Vasooli Bhai | 7 | 0.0135 |
| #5 | sky | 6 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime | 696 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #2 | MagicLennart | 349 | 0.29 | 9 min |
| #3 | sky | 249 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | » mokkorloff_™ /A/ | 202 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | Avarice | 186 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RepercussioN | +3.59 | 75 | 65 |
| #2 | ⭕⃤ P R I? | +2.42 | 58 | 57 |
| #3 | sky | +1.50 | 64 | 62 |
| #4 | Vasooli Bhai | +1.49 | 65 | 62 |
| #5 | MagicLennart | +1.23 | 62 | 71 |





