








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 490 | 29% |
| Smokes | 481 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 426 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 312 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $174,250 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Str0ke- | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | ✪︎ StyriX | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | R1 | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | ................... | 67% | 6 |
| #5 | Split | 67% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Skyfusion | 60% | 62 |
| #9 | 🔸Yuliyan | 57% | 7 |
| #10 | HadesA | 53% | 15 |
| #11 | Paco Di Bango ♛ ♛ ♛ | 50% | 24 |
| #12 | PopSmoke | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skyfusion | 225 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | Mafiota | 44 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | HadesA | 35 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | PopSmoke | 26 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | Split | 25 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Str0ke- | +10.50 | 84 | 78 |
| #2 | Mafiota | +5.13 | 83 | 72 |
| #3 | Skyfusion | +3.86 | 83 | 73 |
| #4 | PopSmoke | +3.51 | 82 | 65 |
| #5 | 🔸Yuliyan | +3.24 | 72 | 32 |





