








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 408 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4385 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,479 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3456 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2500 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2700 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 823 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,216,547 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 367 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MXL | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | ♿feaR | 63% | 40 |
| #3 | ☜☆☞Der[Elo]hath☜☆☞ | 60% | 25 |
| #4 | GameConductor | 57% | 35 |
| #5 | ReBelz | 53% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | vitjaa | 46% | 28 |
| #11 | m0rkus | 46% | 28 |
| #12 | Blade | 44% | 41 |
| #13 | v1olenT | 42% | 102 |
| #14 | luke | 29% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GameConductor | +4.40 | 79 | 82 |
| #2 | luke | +3.27 | 68 | 48 |
| #3 | vitjaa | +2.34 | 78 | 61 |
| #4 | MXL | +2.21 | 72 | 63 |
| #5 | NDY | +2.04 | 72 | 58 |





