








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 162 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 195 matches | ||
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4489 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,890 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4670 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3019 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 5058 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3143 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,334,569 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | 56% | 191 |
| #2 | Ninarino ♥ | 53% | 322 |
| #3 | Felix | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | ART | 51% | 71 |
| #5 | Natcho ⚞ ᴥ ⚟ | 50% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Natcho ⚞ ᴥ ⚟ | 50% | 70 |
| #6 | _#hugo. | 50% | 255 |
| #7 | chief chulio | 46% | 28 |
| #8 | KaSa | 43% | 23 |
| #9 | WellfexX | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ninarino ♥ | 12 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | _#hugo. | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Natcho ⚞ ᴥ ⚟ | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | ART | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ninarino ♥ | 562 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #2 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | 521 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | _#hugo. | 456 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #4 | ART | 228 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | Natcho ⚞ ᴥ ⚟ | 106 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chief chulio | +0.74 | 75 | 65 |
| #2 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | +0.65 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | ART | +0.39 | 65 | 63 |
| #4 | Master#1 | +0.39 | 80 | 72 |
| #5 | Ninarino ♥ | +0.24 | 74 | 60 |





