








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 782 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 305 matches | ||
| Wingman | 212 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5335 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,280 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4756 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6041 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5265 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3218 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,868,248 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 410 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ninarino ♥ | 49% | 131 |
| #2 | Lö Papa | 48% | 155 |
| #3 | Felix | 47% | 201 |
| #4 | _#hugo. | 46% | 148 |
| #5 | Bratan | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Bratan | 46% | 35 |
| #6 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | 43% | 53 |
| #7 | Dumbbell door | 38% | 47 |
| #8 | Trashlord aka ur mom | 38% | 32 |
| #9 | Tikteriとら | 37% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _#hugo. | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Felix | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Lö Papa | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Ninarino ♥ | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Felix | 416 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | Lö Papa | 325 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ninarino ♥ | 254 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | _#hugo. | 227 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | 136 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chief chulio | +2.09 | 78 | 66 |
| #2 | Lö Papa | +1.43 | 79 | 58 |
| #3 | ✪Вебер™ | HunnyBoppin` | +0.19 | 75 | 57 |
| #4 | Ninarino ♥ | +0.16 | 78 | 57 |
| #5 | _#hugo. | -0.68 | 64 | 69 |





