








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 504 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4051 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3086 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4329 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4228 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2435 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,349,367 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 507 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Laiser | 57% | 44 |
| #2 | ✪ Veritas | 52% | 134 |
| #3 | DDoS | 52% | 286 |
| #4 | jNi^ | 52% | 73 |
| #5 | ska-iwnl♛ | 50% | 206 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | jNi^ | 52% | 73 |
| #5 | ska-iwnl♛ | 50% | 206 |
| #6 | ☣ occasionGØD ☣ | 50% | 42 |
| #7 | Das Punkt | 49% | 215 |
| #8 | legathy | 48% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DDoS | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | ska-iwnl♛ | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Das Punkt | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | jNi^ | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | ☣ occasionGØD ☣ | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Veritas | 443 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | ska-iwnl♛ | 430 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | DDoS | 419 | 0.07 | 12 min |
| #4 | jNi^ | 267 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | legathy | 208 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ska-iwnl♛ | +2.34 | 89 | 68 |
| #2 | ✪ Veritas | +1.54 | 68 | 74 |
| #3 | ICEMAN | +1.01 | 81 | 72 |
| #4 | legathy | -0.67 | 72 | 61 |
| #5 | DDoS | -0.83 | 57 | 66 |





