








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 297 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3746 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,755 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2399 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3742 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2560 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3054 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $894,114 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Señor VAC | 10 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Kalashmeister | 9 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | ❥︎M1stickas | 9 | 0.0166 |
| #4 | Henyte | 6 | 0.0148 |
| #5 | Grazas | 4 | 0.0066 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Señor VAC | 238 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #2 | Kalashmeister | 182 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | ❥︎M1stickas | 77 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | SN3XAS | 73 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Grazas | 64 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cannabis | +3.30 | 88 | 57 |
| #2 | haze | +3.12 | 90 | 44 |
| #3 | ❥︎M1stickas | +2.38 | 82 | 65 |
| #4 | Kalashmeister | +2.09 | 90 | 59 |
| #5 | Henyte | +1.09 | 62 | 56 |





