








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 379 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 189 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,205 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3543 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4140 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5443 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 3079 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $930,923 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 202 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wiredjr | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | Weaselface | 55% | 83 |
| #3 | slebe | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Cl0wN | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wiredjr | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | Weaselface | 55% | 83 |
| #3 | slebe | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Cl0wN | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Weaselface | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | wiredjr | 2 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | slebe | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Weaselface | 202 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | Cl0wN | 53 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | slebe | 49 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | wiredjr | 10 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slebe | +4.95 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | triple6 ja seksimania! | +0.23 | 35 | 71 |
| #3 | Cl0wN | +0.00 | 56 | 63 |
| #4 | Weaselface | -0.91 | 34 | 61 |
| #5 | wiredjr | -3.19 | 19 | 34 |





