








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 35 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,130 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1194 | 29% |
| Smokes | 937 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1062 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 937 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $522,536 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jK | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | leeter :> | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | chrizzz | 77% | 13 |
| #4 | Necron | 75% | 8 |
| #5 | gnad1.0 | 75% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | freeze | 65% | 51 |
| #13 | Merka | 58% | 24 |
| #14 | ZugTurmfalke | 58% | 24 |
| #15 | osirisbash | 55% | 11 |
| #16 | LueKeN^ | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fln | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | freeze | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | ZugTurmfalke | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | osirisbash | 1 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Necron | 1 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fln | 349 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | freeze | 187 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | cramX🦥 | 135 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | cockrox | 102 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | pxl | 102 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pxl | +6.16 | 90 | 90 |
| #2 | El Señor de las Nieves | +2.73 | 77 | 56 |
| #3 | jK | +2.17 | 64 | 68 |
| #4 | leeter :> | +1.97 | 72 | 79 |
| #5 | Racoon @ Brunnen | +1.50 | 81 | 60 |





