








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1535 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 374 matches | ||
| Wingman | 304 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 104 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6799 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,985 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5642 | 22% |
| Smokes | 7253 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 7319 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5771 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,912,696 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 726 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aNtrex | 56% | 85 |
| #2 | ARTiSHOCK | 56% | 64 |
| #3 | Necron | 54% | 199 |
| #4 | gnad1.0 | 54% | 326 |
| #5 | Merka | 52% | 847 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merka | 13 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | gnad1.0 | 12 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | chrizzz | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Necron | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | fln | 2 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merka | 3210 | 0.21 | 87 min |
| #2 | chrizzz | 1139 | 0.15 | 25 min |
| #3 | gnad1.0 | 1053 | 0.16 | 25 min |
| #4 | fln | 941 | 0.25 | 25 min |
| #5 | Necron | 619 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fln | +1.24 | 69 | 77 |
| #2 | ZugTurmfalke | +0.87 | 77 | 63 |
| #3 | Necron | +0.74 | 70 | 70 |
| #4 | Merka | +0.07 | 60 | 79 |
| #5 | chrizzz | -0.12 | 81 | 68 |





