








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 705 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 472 matches | ||
| Wingman | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




166 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,747 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10053 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7606 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5604 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4484 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,067,855 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4568 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Honkkari | 54% | 304 |
| #2 | Jaahas | 53% | 83 |
| #3 | Eskon putiikki | 50% | 532 |
| #4 | Rambo-Maistelija | 47% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Honkkari | 54% | 304 |
| #2 | Jaahas | 53% | 83 |
| #3 | Eskon putiikki | 50% | 532 |
| #4 | Rambo-Maistelija | 47% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eskon putiikki | 199 | 0.0178 |
| #2 | Honkkari | 59 | 0.0103 |
| #3 | Jaahas | 27 | 0.0157 |
| #4 | Rambo-Maistelija | 10 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eskon putiikki | 2891 | 0.26 | 68 min |
| #2 | Honkkari | 563 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #3 | Rambo-Maistelija | 138 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Jaahas | 76 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mikkiz | +1.79 | 66 | 66 |
| #2 | Eskon putiikki | +1.01 | 82 | 67 |
| #3 | Jaahas | +0.50 | 86 | 40 |
| #4 | Honkkari | -0.18 | 67 | 63 |
| #5 | Rambo-Maistelija | -2.32 | 61 | 54 |





