








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,626 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4148 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3855 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3253 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2370 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $491,957 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 170 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FLASH | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | Poederbaas | AORUS | 64% | 25 |
| #3 | ♔. | 61% | 127 |
| #4 | Rupel | 61% | 99 |
| #5 | Dempsey | 60% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♔. | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Katen Kyokotsu Karamatsu Shinju | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Rupel | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Lionh34rt[A] | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | hell_fire | 3 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rupel | 386 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #2 | Lionh34rt[A] | 246 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | joenik | 230 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #4 | Dempsey | 162 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | Galyphia | 162 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wsxd | +3.33 | 85 | 73 |
| #2 | Lionh34rt[A] | +1.98 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | hell_fire | +1.15 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | Dempsey | +0.94 | 80 | 56 |
| #5 | joenik | +0.62 | 77 | 69 |





