








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1542 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,535 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 491 | 14% |
| Smokes | 828 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1011 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1205 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $426,921 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓃𝒾𝓁𝒸𝓃 | 86% | 14 |
| #2 | GreenLi | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | ERRE | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | -Nexus- | 69% | 67 |
| #5 | Larsen. | 66% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CED | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | peter's advantage | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | schjerv | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | choker_necklace_girl | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | ngji | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Nexus- | 312 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #2 | choker_necklace_girl | 214 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | peter's advantage | 190 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | schjerv | 76 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | CED | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Nexus- | +4.02 | 87 | 74 |
| #2 | Noname | +3.19 | 85 | 51 |
| #3 | 𝓃𝒾𝓁𝒸𝓃 | +2.26 | 76 | 71 |
| #4 | SvelaN | +2.05 | 72 | 56 |
| #5 | schjerv | +1.65 | 81 | 63 |





