








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 411 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3251 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3808 | 45% |
| Smokes | 1731 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1922 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 917 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $494,164 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 173 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Larsen. | 86% | 28 |
| #2 | ngji | 72% | 43 |
| #3 | SvelaN | 69% | 67 |
| #4 | CED | 69% | 35 |
| #5 | choker_necklace_girl | 66% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | CED | 69% | 35 |
| #5 | choker_necklace_girl | 66% | 124 |
| #6 | peter's advantage | 63% | 98 |
| #7 | Lomax | 60% | 20 |
| #8 | schjerv | 60% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schjerv | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | peter's advantage | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | choker_necklace_girl | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ngji | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | CED | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | peter's advantage | 355 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | choker_necklace_girl | 258 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | schjerv | 185 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Lomax | 85 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | ngji | 61 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Nexus- | +3.78 | 87 | 71 |
| #2 | schjerv | +2.04 | 82 | 69 |
| #3 | SvelaN | +1.56 | 69 | 57 |
| #4 | peter's advantage | +1.24 | 82 | 73 |
| #5 | ngji | +0.30 | 77 | 56 |





