








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
864 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,994 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 466 | 23% |
| Smokes | 549 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 480 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 499 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $168,546 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WARTNITE | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | ajac | 75% | 16 |
| #3 | ium | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | Ian_Dukeman | 62% | 47 |
| #5 | that1guy42 | 58% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ium | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | Ian_Dukeman | 62% | 47 |
| #5 | that1guy42 | 58% | 50 |
| #6 | jfghost | 55% | 31 |
| #7 | TomataWata | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jfghost | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Ian_Dukeman | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | ium | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | that1guy42 | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ian_Dukeman | 123 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | ium | 90 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | that1guy42 | 66 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | jfghost | 54 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | ajac | 53 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | caution | +3.53 | 72 | 62 |
| #2 | that1guy42 | +2.41 | 77 | 50 |
| #3 | ajac | +0.78 | 67 | 62 |
| #4 | WARTNITE | +0.51 | 69 | 76 |
| #5 | Ian_Dukeman | -0.13 | 70 | 62 |





