








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 27 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2588 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,963 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2840 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2100 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2434 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1589 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $624,218 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanvetaren | 70% | 156 |
| #2 | Allram | 65% | 43 |
| #3 | Little John | 63% | 163 |
| #4 | Mongofrog | 61% | 101 |
| #5 | Fnaske | 61% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanvetaren | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Little John | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Fnaske | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Mongofrog | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Allram | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vanvetaren | +4.41 | 86 | 75 |
| #2 | Little John | +2.47 | 80 | 74 |
| #3 | FARFARN | +1.50 | 61 | 66 |
| #4 | Fnaske | -0.98 | 36 | 64 |
| #5 | Allram | -1.39 | 30 | 69 |





