








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 539 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 202 matches | ||
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3828 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5161 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4613 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4313 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4291 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,259,093 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hermulez | 58% | 138 |
| #2 | zade☁ | 55% | 184 |
| #3 | anZiR | 55% | 60 |
| #4 | SiikR | 55% | 122 |
| #5 | Bennet | 52% | 261 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | SiikR | 55% | 122 |
| #5 | Bennet | 52% | 261 |
| #6 | juan roberto carlos raul esteban | 52% | 73 |
| #7 | fisu | 51% | 209 |
| #8 | Tec-Roo | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bennet | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | fisu | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | anZiR | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | zade☁ | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Hermulez | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bennet | 1121 | 0.20 | 31 min |
| #2 | fisu | 737 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| #3 | SiikR | 681 | 0.26 | 21 min |
| #4 | zade☁ | 673 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #5 | Hermulez | 238 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zade☁ | +3.33 | 85 | 81 |
| #2 | SiikR | +1.39 | 74 | 80 |
| #3 | Ahti | +0.68 | 67 | 75 |
| #4 | Hermulez | -0.25 | 79 | 65 |
| #5 | anZiR | -1.36 | 75 | 50 |





