








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 243 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3450 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3269 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4997 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4575 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3033 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $599,588 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holen, Mangopapaya | 57% | 75 |
| #2 | karregg | 56% | 99 |
| #3 | ReaL | 54% | 142 |
| #4 | frieRINSHALLAH | 53% | 34 |
| #5 | ♛XyZ✌ | 49% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ReaL | 54% | 142 |
| #4 | frieRINSHALLAH | 53% | 34 |
| #5 | ♛XyZ✌ | 49% | 75 |
| #6 | ekanツ | 48% | 168 |
| #7 | Neck | 45% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛XyZ✌ | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | ekanツ | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | ReaL | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | karregg | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Holen, Mangopapaya | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ekanツ | 393 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | ♛XyZ✌ | 269 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | ReaL | 250 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | Holen, Mangopapaya | 159 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Neck | 130 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holen, Mangopapaya | +2.48 | 73 | 70 |
| #2 | frieRINSHALLAH | +2.11 | 72 | 67 |
| #3 | dAllas__ | +1.31 | 69 | 69 |
| #4 | karregg | +1.09 | 77 | 54 |
| #5 | ReaL | +0.28 | 57 | 65 |





