








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
681 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,959 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 550 | 19% |
| Smokes | 783 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 987 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 639 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $390,169 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Kebab2g | 44% | 9 |
| #7 | Holen, Mangopapaya | 41% | 29 |
| #8 | karregg | 40% | 42 |
| #9 | ♛XyZ✌ | 38% | 21 |
| #10 | ekanツ | 30% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛XyZ✌ | 5 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | karregg | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | frieRINSHALLAH | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | dAllas__ | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Holen, Mangopapaya | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dAllas__ | 131 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #2 | ekanツ | 96 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | ♛XyZ✌ | 73 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | ReaL | 72 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Holen, Mangopapaya | 64 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frieRINSHALLAH | +3.88 | 71 | 65 |
| #2 | sAllad | +3.07 | 67 | 69 |
| #3 | Holen, Mangopapaya | +2.47 | 77 | 67 |
| #4 | dAllas__ | +1.73 | 70 | 72 |
| #5 | ReaL | +1.48 | 63 | 62 |





