








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
691 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,730 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 532 | 31% |
| Smokes | 585 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 544 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 69 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $250,735 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NoNoYes | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | bogs ✓ | 44% | 91 |
| #3 | DoctorHawkins | 43% | 7 |
| #4 | Ratxillion | 42% | 84 |
| #5 | Ron | 41% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | bogs ✓ | 44% | 91 |
| #3 | DoctorHawkins | 43% | 7 |
| #4 | Ratxillion | 42% | 84 |
| #5 | Ron | 41% | 87 |
| #6 | Playing With no Brain | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bogs ✓ | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Ratxillion | 5 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bogs ✓ | 356 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | Ron | 139 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Ratxillion | 44 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Playing With no Brain | 22 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | NoNoYes | 20 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bogs ✓ | +3.31 | 67 | 68 |
| #2 | DoctorHawkins | +0.54 | 47 | 64 |
| #3 | NoNoYes | -0.39 | 54 | 54 |
| #4 | Playing With no Brain | -0.84 | 69 | 46 |
| #5 | get_mid | -1.11 | 54 | 37 |





