








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 481 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 365 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Renown | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5375 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2405 | 14% |
| Smokes | 5628 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4285 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4754 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,566,563 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 368 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Fryfry | 50% | 161 |
| #7 | maulerslayer | 50% | 58 |
| #8 | Ack3 | 49% | 246 |
| #9 | devogen ☂ | 41% | 61 |
| #10 | frikktion | 33% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | foqie ツ | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | KaffeRast | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Ack3 | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | ツ Escaper ⛟ | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Fryfry | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KaffeRast | 1303 | 0.18 | 36 min |
| #2 | foqie ツ | 498 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #3 | Fryfry | 490 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #4 | ツ Escaper ⛟ | 332 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | Ack3 | 328 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kURT | +1.43 | 67 | 63 |
| #2 | Fryfry | +1.00 | 69 | 79 |
| #3 | foqie ツ | +0.96 | 73 | 65 |
| #4 | KaffeRast | +0.89 | 77 | 71 |
| #5 | Bausef | +0.21 | 55 | 69 |





