








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 535 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3773 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,892 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3616 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3047 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3349 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1880 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $778,151 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1014 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kiko | 78% | 49 |
| #2 | Kayzen "DJ8" | 68% | 28 |
| #3 | QQuaLLe | 65% | 146 |
| #4 | Swordfish | 53% | 19 |
| #5 | meb | 50% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | QQuaLLe | 616 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #2 | meb | 254 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | rumour | 145 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Kiko | 145 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kayzen "DJ8" | 122 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | buffoon | +2.55 | 78 | 65 |
| #2 | Kiko | +1.99 | 83 | 48 |
| #3 | QQuaLLe | +0.99 | 72 | 67 |
| #4 | Kayzen "DJ8" | +0.11 | 76 | 62 |
| #5 | Swordfish | -0.36 | 85 | 60 |





